Sometimes people pleasers feel for whatever reason that they have to get involved in every situation. Every time someone asks them to do something, they do it. Whenever they are asked to get involved, the people pleasers dive in thinking it is their duty to do so.
Even Jesus at times said, “No.”
Did Jesus jump into to solve every problem that people wanted him to address? No. Here is the first example:
Someone in the crowd said to Him, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the family inheritance with me.” But He said to him, “Man, who appointed Me a judge or arbitrator over you?” Then He said to them, “Beware, and be on your guard against every form of greed; for not even when one has an abundance does his life consist of his possessions” (Luke 12:13-15).
What was the real problem in this relationship between the man and his brother, according to Jesus? Greed…plain and simple. Jesus had the wisdom to know that if He jumped in this family drama and tried to be the referee, the real problem would never be solved. I believe this is a great lesson for us, men. It is not that we go around and never get involved in other’s disputes, but we must develop the wisdom with lots of prayer to know when it would be best for us not to get involved.
Whoever meddles in a quarrel not his own is like one who takes a passing dog by the ears (Proverbs 26:17).
Here is a second example of Jesus having to say, “No.”
And Simon and those who were with him searched for him, and they found him and said to him, “Everyone is looking for you.” And he said to them, “Let us go on to the next towns, that I may preach there also, for that is why I came out” (Mark 1:36-38).
Jesus had the power to heal everyone’s sicknesses and diseases, and the crowds knew it. They were flocking to Him – everyone was looking for Him. Even Simon Peter was searching for Him to get the crowds to Him. That makes sense, doesn’t it? However, Jesus had to keep His main mission and purpose in mind. He came to preach the gospel and save people from their sins. Jesus did not come to end all human suffering while He was here on earth.
Here is the most compassionate and selfless Man in history, and He said, “No.” Jesus went on to the other cities to preach, which means that there were people left behind who did not get healed of their sicknesses and diseases. That might be difficult for some to grasp, but that is what Jesus had to do because His main mission was to preach and save souls.
We must remember this as well. There is a time that we must learn to say, “No” to some things so that we can say “Yes” to the purpose and mission to which God has called us. Even the apostles did this exact thing in Jerusalem when they did not get directly involved in caring for the widows, but delegated that task to the seven men appointed for it (Acts 6:1-7). They could not leave their mission and purpose to take care of something that another person should be doing, because in doing so, their own work would not get accomplished.
I encourage you to meditate upon this and pray for wisdom. Again, it is not that we seek to avoid getting involved…that is not the heart of Jesus. But even Jesus and the apostles at times had to set boundaries.